Snowdrops and Anemones
by when-the-silence-ends
Summary: "Kaiya is six years old and she only knows the darkness in her heart. She's past giving up, of believing she's capable of being seen, of love, of existing." Or femnaruto faces different issues during childhood than malenaruto


_So this was sitting finished in my one shot folder. I saw it, read it and polished it up because I felt like it was worth sharing. Its part of my femnaruto I've been building up in the last year or so, so don't be surprised if I post something like this again._

 _It's darker than what I've posted before and illudes to rape so if that is a trigger then I ask that you do skip reading this._

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 **Snowdrops and Anemones**

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At three years old Uzumaki Kaiya is a abnormally pretty child, with her sharp and refined cheekbones, soft pink cupid bow lips, and bright cobalt eyes. Vibrant red hair surrounds her aristocratic face only adding to her beauty. Despite this, she is a very lonely child.

Kaiya is three years old and she already know that she is not loved. She already knows loneliness like it is apart of her. It's the kind of loneliness that's heavy and weighs down her heart until she feels empty; empty and desperate. Desperate for acknowledgement, to be seen, to be anything, anything but lonely. Most people look through her, past her, beyond her. This hurts Kaiya more than the cruel whispers and not so subtle hatred sent her way do. Its crueler. Kami, does it hurt, to never be really seen. To live where love and family and bonds are ideals that she can never ever reach.

Time passes.

She's four years old and sometimes she dreams of being loved, of finding a family, of being _seen_. When she wakes she cries silently and wishes that she could forget those dreams. She doesn't, she _cant._ So she she acts out, she does everything she can do so they look at her. It works, just not how she wants, how she needs.

She's four years old and the orphanage won't house her any more, so she learns to live in the streets. She sees the scum of the world here, and she loses a big piece of herself, her innocence. It makes her wish for a world of peace, of love, but she knows that it's an impossible ideal, but part of her still believes anyway, and that won't ever change, no matter how jaded she becomes.

Time passes.

She's five years old and he's saying that he's only putting her in her place, that she's a demon and this is what she deserves.

It isn't.

Kaiya's five years old and she dies a little inside. _He_ leaves her there in the hotel room with blood and semen dripping down her legs. She doesn't bother to clean herself up because she knows that she'll never ever be clean again. The hotel workers look at her in pity and it's here she learns real cruelty. To see something so depraved and turning the other way.

She is five years old and she becomes cold.

Time passes.

She is six years old, and she's in pieces, she can't stop from crying when she should be living. For months she barely lives, barely survives. _He_ finds her again, and she can't find it in her to fight. She doesn't see the point. She is nothing, unloved, invisible, a monster, less than human, she will die one day and then she can finally be free.

Kaiya is six years old and she only knows the darkness in her heart. She's past giving up, of believing she's capable of being seen, of love, of existing.

She is still six years old and she's walking aimlessly from where _he_ left her smelling of bitterness and blood when she is seen for the first time.

It's a silver haired shinobi who is wandering, an hour late for a meeting that really, truly sees her. She's only a few feet in front of him, her matted red hair is what he sees first and he almost turns away but then he smells her. His chakra flares in alarmfurypainguilthurtsadnesspainpainpain. She looks up, and in the second it takes their eyes to meet he notices she's a chakra sensor, but that thought faded as he really _sees_ her. Behind empty blue eyes this child is broken and beaten. This is the same child he swore to protect before she was born. She stands in front of him covered in the evidence of the worst thing you can do to a person; to rob them of the intimacy of their own body, to steal from them a piece of themselves that they can never ever get back. Kakashi finds purpose again, in a second that feels like an infinity. He will build her back up, he will protect her, he will take care of her, even if it kills him.

Uzumaki Kaiya is six years old and she finds hope.

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 _Title is off flower language and I felt it suited it well. Kaiya, with the characters I chose after some research means forgiveness. I have another fic I need to finish and polish up about the origin of that but it's not too relevant now._

 _Your thoughts/opinions would be appreciated._

 _Thanks for reading._


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